We all want to be happy, and each of us has our own definition of happiness.
I once heard a phrase that seemed very wise to me: «If you are not happy with what you have, you will not be happy with what you lack». It is a phrase similar to «he who has the most is not richer, but he who needs the least». Happiness is here and now, with what we have and with what we have. Happiness begins with accepting and accepting ourselves, how we are, how we feel, what our circumstances are; it has nothing to do with resignation. Happiness continues with gratitude.
Happiness is not outside, in what happens to us, but inside, in how we interpret and what meaning we give to what happens to us, to what we live. Everything is in our mind and depends on the glasses through which we look at reality. Let me give you a simple example: I have planned a wonderful day at the beach, but it starts raining. Depending on the internal dialogue I have with myself, I will be more or less happy in this situation. If I think: «What anger, what bad luck, everything goes wrong and today is going to be a bad day» or if I think «Well, it’s time for a change of plans: today I finally finish my book!», clearly each of these interpretations will generate different feelings and will lead me to live that same rainy day, that same reality, in a different way, more or less happily.
We cannot change the external factors, but we can act on the internal ones: our thoughts and the interpretation of what happens to us, of what we experience. I love a quote from the philosopher and writer Reinhold Niebuhr: «Lord, grant me serenity to accept all that I cannot change, courage to change what I am able to change and wisdom to understand the difference».
So, what if Happiness were an attitude, a decision, a choice? «I decide to be happy». It’s not easy, but it still seems like a path that opens up new possibilities and gives me power over my own life. At that moment, with that decision, the camera and the spotlight turns to me, I am the protagonist of my film. Choosing this path implies many things, the main one being that I take responsibility for my life, and I can’t blame anything or anyone for how I choose to interpret it…..
I invite you not to believe anything I say… Experience it! Try to change your glasses, to change your thoughts and your internal dialogue, to be grateful, to see for yourself if you are happier with what life gives you.
Which glasses do you choose to wear? With which glasses did you read this text?
What is happiness for you?
Learn more about my experience as a Coach
